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Miss Bohrloch (1970)

Dir: John Lindsay

The late British ‘Sex Queen’ Mary Millington, before true fame, went to Germany with photographer/director John Lindsay to churn out a few cheap and cheerful stag films in the early 70‘s.
Almost all are now completely unknown and have never seen the light of day since those days but recently (along with the excellent 1990’s TV documentary “The Mary Millington Story”) 3 of these 8mm shorts have popped up on a DVD-R compilation (the other two being “Betrayed” and “Oral Connection”) and it is this, “Miss Bohrloch”, which is the best known.

According to Lindsay it won the ‘Golden Phallus’ award in some Euro porn festival and sure enough it does have some entertaining and well crafted moments in it’s 14 minute running time.

We open with the delightfully sexual Millington (dubbed with a bizarre American ‘Deep South’ twang) taking time out from high class hooker duty for a spot of DIY satisfaction.
Just then the phone rings and two rather weird men (one looking like a lost Bee Gee and both dubbed over with twee Irish accents) make an appointment to see her…As Mary suddenly deposit’s a damn ping pong ball from her vagina (looped so it goes in and out a few times!) onto the coffee table!

After consulting the ‘menu’ the two guys get down to a spot of three way action with the enthusiastic Mary.
Mary laps up (literally) the oral sessions with unrestrained gusto, as if she is sampling a fine wine, and you can see the natural talent she has for on-screen sex and the passion she puts into it.
The entire running time is now just these two customers being serviced by Mary. They must climax about 8 times each! I’ll have whatever they’re having waitress!

An hysterically unexpected final ‘money shot’, filmed in slow motion, sees the ‘liquid of love’ ejaculate back and forth on a loop before gracefully being allowed to fountain free into Mary’s waiting mouth, it’s a scene that mixes goofy humour with a genuine eroticism at the end as the slow motion, exceptionally messy and moist, orgasm explodes upwards. Hell, it even reminds you (though rather less experimental and more comic) of the famous climax shot in the classic “Behind the Green Door”, only this came out 2 years earlier!

All in all an 8mm stag short that does what it needs to do well and benefits from the on screen glamour, openness and enthusiasm of it’s leading lady.

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Mary Millington - A short bio and appreciation.

Millington (real name Mary Ruth Quilter) was the closest the small time UK porn industry and Sexploitation fields ever came to having a true star. Well known (and infamous) during her heyday she would flaunt herself and her natural sexuality in magazines, in public with home-grown stars of the day and in private with rich foreign business men, foreign royalty.
She never flinched from her fans either and later went on to run 2 London-based sex shops that would see her dispense her own stock from behind the counter. The fans loved it and her bubbly, brash openness and honesty meant the general public (those not driven by prudish fanaticism) genuinely took to her and took less offence from her as would otherwise have been the case.
She also loved sex and saw nothing but beauty and naturalism in the displaying of the naked human form.

Her adult photography work led to more mainstream release soft core films (mostly the stupendously popular at the time sex comedies), and even more fame and fortune, when she hooked up with brash porn promoter and publisher David Sullivan.
Even a total dud like “Come Play with Me”, (where she was famously roped in to doing extra nudity/very tame sex scenes to spice up the slapstick comedy heavy plot that was the majority of the running time) became a huge and amazingly long running hit and is still the longest-running film in British movie history.

She even tried her hand at playing a Policewoman in the weird mixture of Sexploitation frolics and Giallo tinged murders that was "The Playbirds"

But the ‘establishment’ and the Law did not take as kindly to Mary as her fans and soon she was beset by legal wrangling, raids, arrests and came under the close scrutiny of the authorities.
Her loud anti-censorship campaigning also ensured she became Public Enemy #1 to those who saw such people and their lifestyles as a danger to society.
She even stripped topless outside of the Prime Minister's official residence, Number 10 Downing Street!

Suffering from a need to be noticed and acknowledged that went well beyond the healthy, Millington would later openly shop lift and soon became hooked on cocaine.
As trial followed trial and tax bill followed tax bill Mary gradually went into a downward spiral that saw her ‘girl next door’ looks fade and would end with her suicide on 9th August 1979. She was just 33 years old.
RIP.